Priyangshu Goswami
I have a wide variety of clients at Flonker.
Next to personal effectiveness, burn out and core confidence I am really interested in the dynamics between people. Feeling safe and secure and finding a good balance between yourself and the people around you are important topics in my coaching.
I am also hosting a special program for students (The Coaching Classroom) and give workshop for companies and student associations.
Feelings are the spices of life
Sometimes life can really be a bit too spicy!
Do you suffer from your feelings:
Feeling insecure, anxious or panicky?
Feeling overwhelmed by all the possible choices you have to make?
Fear of missing out? Feeling unable to choose because you never know what the right one is?
Feeling unproductive and out of creativity?
Or do you feel like you don't belong? Feeling lonely and detached?
Do you feel not worthy, too much or not able to contribute anything good?
Having trouble getting or holding on to a good and healthy relationship?
Feeling down or depressed, no perspective and no energy?
Then it's time for action!
Living in Survivalmode
Feelings can be strong and overwhelming. They can get you down, draining the energy out of you or just confuse and irritate you. Suppressing feelings is only a temporary solution. They not only alienate you from yourself, making you feel unbearably lonely but also prevent you finding your path in life. Blokked feelings make you feel lonely, diconnected and depressed. Also the fast forward attempt, work hard, play hard, won’t do you much good in the long run: the moment you stop being busy you either collapse or be overwhelmed by old feelings
Your solution
There is a solution for restlessness, anxiety, feelings of depression, panic, irritation, lack of self-confidence, feeling guilty or ashamed, jealousy and so on...
That is by understanding how your feelings works. Somehow you already know...
You know you're ashamed because you did something that doesn't suit you. That you're jealous because you're afraid of losing someone or because you don't think you're good enough. That you feel down because you actually want to do something completely different with your life... and so on
Everyone has access to this 'knowing', it is a practical form of intuition. But to actually do something with this, you will first have to learn how to act on your feelings.
Because to really change, you have to be able to tolerate your feeling. Anxiety is not a problem, panic is not a problem, loneliness is not a problem. As long as you know how to deal with it.
Feeling is logical by nature and works according to patterns. Kind of like, "If you press here, it hurts there." By figuring out how your patterns work, you can not only ensure that you are less affected, but you also get a lot of tools to properly interpret your anxiety, your feelings and to know how to deal with it. Insight and tools for your restlessness and other uncomfortable feeling.
Would you like to know how this works for you? Schedule an intake call with me and I'll explain how you can find out.
Feelings Based Coaching
Humanity has developed itself over time into a thinking being. Because the thinking human brain was the last to develop, it also seems superior to the other brains: the reptilian brain and the mammalian brain.
Much coaching therefore focuses on learning to think differently.
But ultimately it is about the integration of these brains. The feeling system establishes the connection between these brains and ensures that feeling and thinking can be integrated into knowing. The Flonker Integration Model explains how these sensory systems work, both physically (in your brain) and functionally.
Basically there are three levels on which we can function: relaxed, under stress and closed off. The degree of danger (mental or physical) and the possibilities to regulate this danger determines at what level we function. If there is a lot of (experienced) danger, there is a lot of fear and a body will go into survival mode and shut itself off from too intense feelings or the environment.
The Feelings Based coaching method teaches how to deal with the feeling systems on these three levels.
The feeling systems can be displayed in a practical map of your personal feeling system: The Feelings Blueprint. This makes feeling logical and it is easy to see why you do something and what is needed, in the bottom layer of feeling, to change.
Unrest, panic, loneliness, depression and all intense feelings are at the core feelings that don't make sense.
A professional tennis player knows exactly where to hit the ball, how hard and with what effect.
I know exactly how feeling works and I am happy to help you find out how your feeling works.
Schedule an intake call with me and I'll explain how.
My Programs
why work with me?
- Reducing fear and anxiety in your life
- Increasing creativity and productivity
- Building your Core Confidence
- Helping you understand your own feeling system (Blueprint to your brain)
- Live a holistic and purposeful life.
My goal is your happiness and peace of mind. I deeply care and enjoy bringing out the best in you, while understanding where you are coming from and supporting you in creating a life you love.
Here is the plan...
There are two driving forces in life: avoiding pain and bad feelings, and finding pleasure. I can help you figure out how to handle both.
Based on your questions and goals we go over a broad range of topics in a structured but storydriven manner. We will analyze your patterns, automatism and coping mechanisms and figure out ways that suit you better. So you can find a better place to start your life than where you
01
From the beginning
I was born and raised in India. Growing up in India is beautiful and I have many happy memories about my childhood. But looking back I also always felt like I was in a race. Society in India is extremely competitive. No wonder: given the amount of people living there! Just like any other asian parents my parents wanted me to be successful in life: achieve good grades in school, get into a good University and become an engineer, lawyer, doctor or something like that. The Indian education system is focussed on being successful and is known for putting a lot of pressure on students. The underlying feeling is that if you have a good education, you will get a good job, you will be successful and then you will be happy.
02
Welcome to the race
So obviously I started my education. But instead of growing and developing myself, I felt that I got further and further away from myself. Instead of being curious and creative and experiencing life I felt sad, lonely and exhausted. It seemed like everyone around me only cared about my grades and whether I would fit into the expectations of what they wanted me to become.
Since I was a child, I always remember deeply caring for the people around me and wanting to see them be happy. So no matter the loneliness, exhaustion or the pressure I felt, I put in the hours and made sure to deliver what was expected. So that the closest people around me would feel happy, I had no different way of looking at my life since this was all I knew. So I girded my way through my school and ended up in the Netherlands for my university degree.
03
A new country, same me!
Even though I was in a different country, my main goal was to finish my university with good grades and get a Job, which would make my parents proud and happy. Throughout my university years I met some great people along the way, some who stayed in my life and some who did not. But talking & connecting to them gave me a very particular feeling, a feeling which said “Do you even know who you are or why do you even do the things you do”. I started realising that some parts of me were missing or maybe not found yet.
I remember how passionately people would talk about their dreams, adventures, traveling experiences. Or talk about these crazy experiences they have lived through, or tell me about how they have met someone special and are having this amazing time getting to know one another.
04
Falling on all fours
And I wanted that, not just the experiences or the relationships but the passion they had for who they were. Even though their lives were not perfect it felt like they were still content or happy enough. All these relaization were really confronting and painful to accept. Thinking about the years of tears, sweat and hard work I had put into myself to do well in school, but none of that made me happy. It’s tough to find yourself, I mean where do you even start.
I couldn’t relate to anyone, the pressure for all the things I had to do, the expectations of my parents I had to hold up…… they all got to me and so I crumbled, my foundation broke, and I fell face flat onto the ground. This is when I realized that I actually abandoned myself way back when I was a kid to make others happy. Not having my own Identity but taking on what other people wanted me to become. I had no goal of my own, no purpose and no direction other than study all the time.
05
Returning to Myself
So I started again, step by step building myself. By understanding who I am, and discovering my own internal thoughts and feelings. Discovering the importance of being truly connected with other people and finding back my creativity, energy and joy. Instead of doing what others wanted slowly thinking and feeling about what I wanted. I started spending more time with myself, taking care of myself, and stopped listening to that inner critic who would constantly shamed or guilted me for doing things my way.
I found new ways of dealing with my feelings, understanding how my body and mind react to certain triggers and events around me. Slowly but surely I started recognizing and liking the parts of who I was becoming. Since then I believe that even when life can seem extremely difficult, you still can’t give up on yourself. I am happy that I tried and I am sincerely happy to meet the people that helped me connect with myself again.
06
Redefining my life
Understanding my own thoughts & feelings actually allowed me to follow my own purpose. For the past 3 years I have been helping people develop better confidence and competence in life and in their relationships. I not only know how it is to feel down, lonely and confused, but I know how to deal with those feelings so I can also feel happiness and fulfillment.
Last year my parents came over to the Netherlands. I was so excited to show them my workplace and what I would do as a coach. They were really proud and excited to see me grow into my own skin. But most importantly they were happy to see me happy. You can say I accomplished my goal here! So in the end, I found my purpose for now and I still have a lot to discover about life. But I know how to handle the bad moments and reach the good ones. And most of all I know how to connect to other people. And the good thing is that I can teach you too. Just give me a call.
My Programs
01
From the beginning
I was born and raised in India. Growing up in India is beautiful and I have many happy memories about my childhood. But looking back I also always felt like I was in a race. Society in India is extremely competitive. No wonder: given the amount of people living there! Just like any other asian parents my parents wanted me to be successful in life: achieve good grades in school, get into a good University and become an engineer, lawyer, doctor or something like that. The Indian education system is focussed on being successful and is known for putting a lot of pressure on students. The underlying feeling is that if you have a good education, you will get a good job, you will be successful and then you will be happy.
02
Welcome to the race
So obviously I started my education. But instead of growing and developing myself, I felt that I got further and further away from myself. Instead of being curious and creative and experiencing life I felt sad, lonely and exhausted. It seemed like everyone around me only cared about my grades and whether I would fit into the expectations of what they wanted me to become.
Since I was a child, I always remember deeply caring for the people around me and wanting to see them be happy. So no matter the loneliness, exhaustion or the pressure I felt, I put in the hours and made sure to deliver what was expected. So that the closest people around me would feel happy, I had no different way of looking at my life since this was all I knew. So I girded my way through my school and ended up in the Netherlands for my university degree.
03
A new country, same me!
Even though I was in a different country, my main goal was to finish my university with good grades and get a Job, which would make my parents proud and happy. Throughout my university years I met some great people along the way, some who stayed in my life and some who did not. But talking & connecting to them gave me a very particular feeling, a feeling which said “Do you even know who you are or why do you even do the things you do”. I started realising that some parts of me were missing or maybe not found yet.
I remember how passionately people would talk about their dreams, adventures, traveling experiences. Or talk about these crazy experiences they have lived through, or tell me about how they have met someone special and are having this amazing time getting to know one another.
04
Falling on all fours
And I wanted that, not just the experiences or the relationships but the passion they had for who they were. Even though their lives were not perfect it felt like they were still content or happy enough. All these relaization were really confronting and painful to accept. Thinking about the years of tears, sweat and hard work I had put into myself to do well in school, but none of that made me happy. It’s tough to find yourself, I mean where do you even start.
I couldn’t relate to anyone, the pressure for all the things I had to do, the expectations of my parents I had to hold up…… they all got to me and so I crumbled, my foundation broke, and I fell face flat onto the ground. This is when I realized that I actually abandoned myself way back when I was a kid to make others happy. Not having my own Identity but taking on what other people wanted me to become. I had no goal of my own, no purpose and no direction other than study all the time.
05
Returning to Myself
So I started again, step by step building myself. By understanding who I am, and discovering my own internal thoughts and feelings. Discovering the importance of being truly connected with other people and finding back my creativity, energy and joy. Instead of doing what others wanted slowly thinking and feeling about what I wanted. I started spending more time with myself, taking care of myself, and stopped listening to that inner critic who would constantly shamed or guilted me for doing things my way.
I found new ways of dealing with my feelings, understanding how my body and mind react to certain triggers and events around me. Slowly but surely I started recognizing and liking the parts of who I was becoming. Since then I believe that even when life can seem extremely difficult, you still can’t give up on yourself. I am happy that I tried and I am sincerely happy to meet the people that helped me connect with myself again.
Here is what others have to say...
Testimonials
The program was inclusive, with everyone in our group being open and friendly. Pri really set the mood, and always made sure that there were good vibes and that everyone felt comfortable. The topics that we discussed gave a nice change of perspective, or at the very least gave me insight into my thoughts and actions, and those of others. I really enjoyed it and would recommend the Coaching Classroom to any student in Groningen.
Diego
Age; 22
For me I feel like this program was very useful. It gave me the tools to deal with stress and my own anxiety. Pri would guide us through multiple topics throughout the program and from that would give us insights on how to better understand our feelings, thoughts, an dour actions. He always create a very comfortable environment which allowed all of us to share our own stories and experiences. Pri would also take his time while explaining the topics in the classroom and also listen to our questions when we had any. I definitely feel I learned a lot from this course and I would recommend any student of Groningen to try out this course.
Paola
Age; 24
My experience with Pri: “When life gives you lemons, call Pri. He will show you how to make tasty lemonade! If it feels like your life plunges or you’ve lost your direction and who you are, reach out to him. In our one-on-one sessions Pri helped me simplify and validate my feelings and situation. Pri’s compassionate, uplifting and effective coaching style gave me perspective and shed light on the aspects of myself that concealed in the blurriness. He created a secure space that encouraged me to trust him with my feelings, to open up, and to understand myself on a deeper neurological level. His tools gave me clarity and became a reference point in how I lead my life and approach all relationships in it.
Thank you, Pri!”
EVI
Age; 27
The sessions with Pri are not always easy but I think that’s a good thing. He makes you think in other directions and gives good examples to explain his thoughts and advices. The thing I like about the sessions with Pri is the way he makes you think about the bigger things in life.
Lynn
Age; 33
”Pri gave me tools to find out what is important to me, where I want to focus on in my life and what needs development. He put me in the right direction and now it’s on me to use the tools he gave me and develop myself in to the life I want to lead. Pri is a wonderful person, a good listener, gives you beautiful insights, is willing to learn and eager to help. I wish everybody (a) Pri in their life. The basic program gave me tools and insights. I liked the personal touch he gave it by showing examples of his own life and the way he reacted to my personal issues.
Ina
Age; 57
”I really liked the program, it helps you to look at things differently. It helped me to put my own qualities and talents in a different perspective. And I learned how to use them in job applications and interviews. By asking the right questions Pri helped me getting a clearer view of what motivates me not only work-wise but also in my personal life. I now know which steps to take to get to my goals.”
Sarah
Age; 28
Your program offered me a quiet place in the everyday hustle and bustle. You really take time to listen and kindly lead into introspection. You challenged me to set up the true goals in life, and which values truly matters. That gradually connected me with myself. I want to thank you for the wisdom you brought, your natural calm and understanding. The models really helped to clarify my inner fears and strengths, from where I could regain confidence and belief. You were a great gift, I hope you will mean a lot to others.
Bea
Age; 44
Time for action!
There is a time for thinking and for feeling, but now is the time for Action!
Because if you keep doing what you always do, you’ll get what you always got!
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- Robert Schumanstraat 38, 9728 SK Groningen
- secretariaat@flonker.nl
- +31 620902613